We Called Her Miss Barbara

It was a different century (even a different millennium) when I first met her. My life was upside down and she would help to right it. We shared a surname (she got it by marriage, I got it be adoption), but we shared so much more ... right from the start. She loved my boys. I called her, "Miss Barbara." It was a humid, hot July day in 1990 when our life-paths first crossed. I was interviewing for a job with an Atlanta nonprofit. She worked in the office ... she was the "office." Finances, telephone triage, complaint handler, volunteer coordinator, correspondence, supplies, first-aid, Tylenol hander-outer, donation recording and receipting, mail handler, payroll, secretary for the Board, and all. You get the picture. I laugh when I hear people today, in the workplace, talking about what they will "do and not do." Miss Barbara did it all, and usually with a smile. Although I never had to wonder where she stood on a situation or her thoughts regarding a matter. She was crystal clear! She was honest! She embodied integrity! She spoke her mind and let me know what she thought! She believed in the mission of helping others. She taught me to drink from her well of mission, caring philosophy. Would that more people in this world drank from her well!

As the years sped past roles changed, but the heart of the work and commitment to the work never did. Miss Barbara would say, "You can't change the past, but maybe you can learn from it." Miss Barbara was candid, plain-spoken, and had an uncanny way of being able to see way down the road and speak the future, in the present. I chuckle when I remember one day when I heard someone say that she shouldn't be so quick to share her opinion. I wondered, "Why not?" She's right on. But, then, she was right about so many things. How can a person be "that right?" I suspect that it was her centering that made her "right" so often. She was right when she said ...
1. People matter.
2. Everything we do should be to help others.
3. If you don't care, get out! No room for laziness here!
4. Use donations and resources wisely. Someone sacrificed to make that donation.
5. Honesty and integrity are at the core, center of every moment or every day.
6. Make everyday count. We are not promised tomorrow.
7. Know that you may be hurt, but do what is right anyway.
8. Hold tightly to your faith. It is an anchor in the storm.
9. Don't get too big for your britches!

We called her Miss Barbara! (She was married and had a loving family, but we still called her Miss Barbara.) We loved her. We trusted her. We knew where we stood with her. We knew that she could swing a mean stick, but she always used it for our good. That, too, we knew unequivocally! And, she always had a twinkle in eye. She always had the necessary band-aids for life. She was a constant in the midst of change. Yes, life changes took us in various directions. Changing addresses. Changing times. But, in a world that often resembled a bowl of spaghetti, I could always find that single strand that led me back to Miss Barbara. She never changed! She was always present. And, she is present still.

While death this week stilled her earthly voice, she still speaks loudly and clearly. Her voice is heard from the heart. Listen, listen! She says, "When I'm right, I'm right. You do what's right, young man!" Well, the "young man" is "young no longer." (Actually, he wasn't even young when she called him, "Young man!"). But, Miss Barbara is still right! I will miss her birthday cards, Christmas cards, caring spirit, good heart, voice of honesty, work til the job is done attitude, wise counsel, speak her mind, call it straight disposition, and forthright gumption!

We called her Miss Barbara, but those of us that knew her at called her so much more, not the least of which was "friend." You live in our hearts, Miss Barbara. The world is better place because of you. We are better people because you cared. We called her simply "Miss Barbara" ... but her name meant so much more, and always will! Until we see you again, Miss Barbara, we say, "Father, in thy gracious keeping, leave we now thy servant sleeping." Amen.